Not quite what 8 year old me had in mind

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Futures Past.”

As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? How close or far are you from that vision?

Growing up I always had a very active imagination (I still do) and what I wanted to be as a grown up would change every day.  My childhood dreams varied in a number of ways, from nurse (sensible, kind, helpful) to the more unrealistic (read insane!).  Some of my more crazy ambitions included:

  • Astronaut – what kid doesn’t have this dream?
  • Space cowboy – my brother’s influence no doubt
  • Actress – this dream was probably less likely than the two above.  I have absolutely no acting (or singing) ability and quite frankly was lucky if I got cast as a tree in school plays
  • Superhero – I always found it difficult to pick my favourite superhero so imagined myself as an amalgam of all the best Marvel and DC heroes
  • Air traffic controller – this was a slightly more recent dream (from about 10 or so years ago).  There are numerous issues with this one;
    • I have absolutely no sense of direction (I get lost a lot)
    • I cannot read a map to save my life (my dad tried to teach me but soon figured out that I’m a bit of a lost cause in this department)
    • Apparently this job has a really high suicide rate due to the stressful nature of the role.  I’m not a major fan of stress (who is?) so this idea quickly got ruled out.

I have always lacked direction.  I could easily tell you exactly what I don’t want to do with my life, but when it comes to what I do want to do I have always struggled to come up with an answer.  Throughout university all of my friends had specific career paths in mind whilst I happily ambled along figuring it would all sort itself out.  Suffice to say everyone thought I was a bit of an ostrich – cue lots of people offering me “helpful advice”.

Upon graduating the tables seemed to turn.  Of our group I was the first to get what was considered a ‘grown up’ job – the job meant a move to a big city, my own flat etc. and a few jealous friends.  They had all set themselves a specific career path but it was harder to break in to these areas than they envisaged.  The flexibility that came with having no direction meant I was open to try different experiences.

Now don’t get me wrong, my lack of direction has not always been a good thing.  I wasted a few years in a job that made me miserable, working with people I didn’t like – and why did I do this?  The answer is simple; I was good at it, and admitting it wasn’t right for me felt like I was failing.  Things finally came to a head after a traumatic experience in my personal life made me put things in to perspective and I quit.  I did this without another job lined up (at a time of high unemployment figures in the UK).  To this day this is one of the more reckless things I have done, as well as one of the best.

I eventually fell in to my current job which most definitely doesn’t match my more imaginative childhood dreams.  Funnily enough it is closer to the more sensible roles I used to play as a child.  Whilst not a nurse (needles bother me – a lot!) I do work in the ‘health’ industry for a charity and my job, whilst not involving Stetsons or aliens, is for the most part interesting and fulfilling.

Advertisements

Colour and clutter

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Clean Slate.”

Explore the room you’re in as if you’re seeing it for the first time. Pretend you know nothing. What do you see? Who is the person who lives there?

DSCF1010

The room I am in is small but functional.  It is attached to the living room and has a large window across from me that faces a row of trees that are full of their summer foliage.

There is an oven to my left, work space and a sink in front of me, and a fridge to my right.  The walls are an off white that is generally referred to as magnolia.  The walls are the plainest thing in this room.  Everything else is an explosion of colour; reds, pinks, blues, greens and all the rainbow colours between.  Absolutely nothing matches – the crockery are all different shapes and sizes, but weirdly it all looks like it belongs together.  A stack of geese measuring cups sit facing storage jars covered in matryoshka nesting dolls – they look like they could be having a conversation.

So this is my kitchen – its tiny and cluttered and I absolutely love it.  I am renting so I have absolutely no say in the wall colour (magnolia is so blah!) so to make up for this I have adopted a mantra of ‘anything goes’,  It doesn’t matter what colour or style something is, if I like it I’ll get it.  In not caring whether or not anything matches I have gathered a variety of kitchen gadgets, plates, storage jars etc. that really shouldn’t work together but do (or in my mind they do anyway).

Mine is not a minimalist home – I would struggle with white walls and clean lines.  I like colour and clutter and that homely feel, which for me it is impossible to have without a myriad of ‘bits and bobs’.

Basket case sounds about right

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Don’t You Forget About Me.”

Imagine yourself at the end of your life. What sort of legacy will you leave? Describe the lasting effect you want to have on the world, after you’re gone cheerful thought Daily Prompt!

Admittedly it would be pretty cool if my headstone included either of the following…

  • “She saved the world…a lot” (Buffy Summers, Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
  • “She did it the hard way” (Bette Davis)

To be honest though the first is unlikely – I am prone to laziness and I don’t possess any of the skills that might one day save the world (unless eating chocolate or having the ability to retain completely useless bits of information may one day save mankind from an asteroid or plague?).  The second epitaph is getting closer as I do seem to like to make things difficult for myself (not always intentionally).

That being said I don’t mind if my life doesn’t leave a lasting legacy on the world, but I would like it to have had a (positive) impact on those around me.  To make those around me happy and to hopefully enrich their lives in some small way is all that I really hope for.

Whilst my name may never go down in the history books (that is unless I die in some weird manner) I would hope that I would be remembered fondly amongst the people I love, because after all theirs are the opinions that mean the most to me.

“You see us as you want to see us—in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain…and an athlete…and a basket case…a princess…and a criminal. Does that answer your question?” (Breakfast Club)

She said

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “S/he Said.”

Pause whatever you’re doing, and ask the person nearest you what they’re thinking about (call someone if you have to). Write a post based on it.

“What am I going to do with my life?”  Nine simple little words in response to asking her what was on her mind.  On their own these words are harmless, however put together they make up a question that weighs heavy.  A questions that ebbs in to every part of life – work, love, friendship.

In a twist to the prompt I decided to write about a recent conversation I had with a friend who had noticed that I seemed a little out of sorts and asked what was on my mind.  Those simple nine words were my response, and it’s a question that I have been toying with for a while

I’m stuck in a rut – I have been for a while.  I feel as though my life is at a bit of a standstill and I am not sure how to go about getting things moving again.  In a bid to try and get some momentum back in to my life I have decided to try and get out of my comfort zone and make some changes in my life.

Now being a bit of a wuss I’m going to start small and work the nerve up to the bigger things.  Here are a few of the things on my list of things of changes to be made:

  1. Haircut – I detest going to the hairdressers with a passion, which is evident from my extremely long and messy barnet.  It’s a little thing but I’m going to cut it short (not too short – I’m not that brave) so I have a visible reminder of the changes I want to make to my life each time I look in the mirror.
  2. Get fit – Following a bad injury a few years ago my fitness has slipped.  So I am going to do something about it – starting with a Zumba class at my local gym (it should be interesting especially considering my two left feet!).
  3. Work/life balance – work has always won out between these two.  I have finally got to a point in my life where I earn a half-decent salary in a job that I am good at.  The problem is that my job is stressful and whilst I get some satisfaction from it I’m not sure if I really enjoy it.  I’m going to have to ponder this some more and decide whether a career re-think is in order.
“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself” Andy Warhol

It’s not all Flux capacitors and hoverboards!

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Advantage of Foresight.”

You’ve been granted the power to predict the future! The catch — each time you use your power, it costs you one day (as in, you’ll live one day less). How would you use this power, it at all?

As a natural born worrier I’m not sure I would want to be able to predict the future.  Sure it might be fun on the odd occasion, but it also could be scary or depressing if the future is bleak.

Lets say you look in to the future and see something bad is going to happen.  Not only does seeing this knock a day off your lifetime, but it would be likely that you change your actions in order to avoid this bad thing.  The fact that you did something different could ultimately lead to the bad event, or could trigger something worse.  I am terrible at explaining this so I would recommend watching Stargate SG-1 episode ‘Prophecy’ (season 6 episode 21) which covers this much better than I can.  Glimpses of the future are open to interpretation – which is risky in itself.

A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it.” Jean de la Fontaine

Putting all that aside I have made a few decisions in my life which initially seemed to be bad ones.  As it turns out things had to get worse before they got better.  If I had glimpsed in to the future chances are I would have done the exact opposite and who knows how things would have panned out.

And because there is no way I can write a post about glimpsing the future without referencing one of the greatest films of all times…

George McFly: “Lorraine.  My density has brought me to you.”

Lorraine Baines: “What?”

George McFly: “Oh.  What I meant to say was…”

Lorraine Baines: “Wait a minute.  Don’t I know you from somewhere?”

George McFly: “Yes.  Yes.  I’m George.  George McFly.  I’m your density.  I mean, your destiny.”

Back to the Future (1985)

Be kind rewind

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Going Obsolete.”

Of all the technologies that have gone extinct in your lifetime, which one do you miss the most?

There aren’t too many technologies that I miss but the VCR is one of them.  Mine sadly died a death about 10 years ago leaving me with a pile of videos that can no longer be watched (it’s nigh on impossible to find a video player these days).

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not stuck in the old days – I have fully embraced dvd’s, blu ray, online streaming etc.  What I miss is the random things I used to video off the TV.  Random recordings that I have mostly forgotten now but seemed hugely important at the time.  I miss being able to take that trip down memory lane, even if it is just to watch the second half of ‘True Lies’ because I couldn’t stay awake long enough to watch the movie in full!

“I’ll be Bill Murray and you’ll be everyone else.” Be Kind Rewind (2008)